Chaos in Eastern Congo

The M23 rebels in Eastern Congo decided to reek havoc once again. November 20th they launched an uprising against the government and took over Goma. This part of the country is rich in mineral resources and a constant battle for who gets to be in charge of it. Diamonds, copper, gold and coltan (a key component in the cell phones and other electronics we enjoy so much every day). The rebels spend their time killing innocent people and raping their women (rape is a weapon of war in the DRC). It is a devastating reality for the people in this country especially considering they are literally sitting on a gold mine of wealth. The Congo has been named "The Heart Of Darkness" and rightfully so. I'm not quite sure our little girl could be in a worse place. It's a shame considering how beautiful and how much potential this country has. From it's rain forests to its mountain gorillas. One day I really hope it will be at peace and we can take her back there. So on Thanksgiving we were notified that it was time to get Zola out of there. Her and 2 other children that are being adopted are still in Eastern Congo. The rebels had taken over Goma and the airports were shut down. Our agency has been trying every resource they can think of to get the kids out of there.  Everything from getting them in to Rwanda and flying them out of there.. to contacts with MONESCO at the UN. Unfortunately without the passports they can't leave the country. I haven't got any updates yet on the status of the transfer. But I did just read that they are reopening the airports. That is good news for getting Zola transferred to arms of love in Kinshasa where we will be picking her up. We have been assured that she is safe and since her orphanage in Katana is pretty much self sustaining she has been eating too. We're grateful for the outpouring of love, support, and prayers that people have offered with her in this dangerous area. When we have an update on her transfer we will be sure to let everyone know.

HAPPY 2ND BIRTHDAY!!!!

So today we celebrated Zola's 2nd birthday without her. I was so excited to make a cake and to have a little celebration. I got it in my head that I would make a pale pink and zebra cake. How fitting to buy her the Zebra that goes to the Zoo we bought her for her birthday. It was the perfect plan!! Until the Zebra was NO WHERE TO BE FOUND!!!!! I am not kidding when I say we went EVERYWHERE looking for the zebra. After 20 stores we just wanted to find ANY ZEBRA. I kid you not it was like trying to find the arc of the covenant! Since when do stores not have zebra anything!! We were going out of our minds. It was completely absurd. I was beyond frustrated and devastated because her birthday was now ruined (in my dramatic mind). Finally we gave up and decided that in the morning (her actual birthday) we would go to the Zoo. We have a zoo pass and they are certain to have a plastic zebra there. So on her birthday morning we went to the zoo. Watched the adorable baby orangutan whom we love to go see. Tried to pretend we weren't sad that Zola wasn't there with us. Went to the gift shop and found acceptable zebras for the cake. Why not buy 2 since they are small and she's turning 2. So there you have it. Cake disaster complete. Went home, made the cake. It turned out adorable. Happy ending to a dramatic day right? Wrong...I couldn't hold back the tears anymore. All I wanted was for her to come running (carefully) down the stairs to see her birthday cake. To just destroy it and love every minute of it. And then of course I made it worse on myself by thinking about what her birthday was like in her orphanage..That it just passed on by without being special. No cake, no special dinner, no zebras. Then the tears were really falling. I just prayed all day that someone would at least pick her up and love her. Or find a reason to make her smile. Of course she doesn't know what she is missing. But I never want her to miss anything. I definitely never want to celebrate another one of her birthdays without her.  And I can't wait to see her smiling face when she turns 3.

ALL GROWN UP

Wish I could bring them all home!!

Zola and her posse

Love to see her in some styling shoes. Big improvement from last  time. 

Paul unlocks a smile 

When we accepted our referral we agreed to be in a pilot program. Zola's (Marie, Regine, you choose) adoption was going to take place in Bukavu until the last portion when she would be transferred to Kinshasha (the capital of DRC). We didn't care how it was handled as long as she got to come home. Her orphanage we have been told is the best they have seen in the DRC.  It is mostly self sustaining. They have a garden where they grow their food and really raise everything except for fish. So she is getting eggs daily and eating. What more can you want?! The orphanage is well kept and clean and pretty incredible. It has been inspiration for Wasatch (our agency) to buy and start their own orphanage/in between house until the children are picked up by their adoptive parents. This new orphanage is in Kinshasa and is called Arms Of Love. Zola will be transferred there towards the end of the adoption process. The hardest part for us with having her in Eastern Congo is that when all the other families in the process are getting loads of pictures and videos of their children, we aren't. When people are sending books and toys and clothes to their kids, we don't get to. It has actually been really really hard to miss out on the last 4 months of her life. And getting the group emails that there are loads of new pictures of the kids is heart breaking when you're told that of course your child isn't in them. Nobody can understand the value of a picture of their child until they are going through this  themselves. There are no words to describe how much that brightens your day and puts your heart at ease. Well miracles do happen. The day that Zola's case went to court Paul (our lawyer) went to her orphanage and took us some new pictures.  So the next morning I woke up to the best email EVER!! Pictures of our BIG girl!!! Finally a day of happy tears!!!! Apparently Zola's orphanage in Katana is not easy to access and it's way out of the way. So a huge thanks to Julia for pushing Paul to go and get us some new photos. It is the first time we have got to see a glimpse of a smile on her precious face. She looks healthy and is growing and we just adore her.

THE IN BETWEEN

I ran out of hangers so the rest is in bags

Nothing but adorable in there!

Yes she needed this Zoo. How else is she going to learn the animal names in Enlgish?

What do you do while you wait for that precious little gem to finally come home?  Well, you become an EXPERT at checking your email. Every time that icon comes flashing on your cell phone you're on it! Just to realize it's Bed Bath and Beyond reminding you that you have a 20% off a single item coupon waiting to be used. After months of this you decide to unsubscribe from every store you have ever shopped at. Just to find that the envelop icon NEVER visits you anymore. And the hope of some news was better than no news at all.  Then you realize that maybe those 20% off coupons are a blessing instead of a nuisance. You become an expert at shopping. Spend $50 at Gymboree and get $25 back in Gymbucks to use at another visit. Do you know how much I can get nowadays at Gymboree with $50. It's seriously impressive. Then you might wonder...What do you do as the months tick by and her entire closet is 2T-3T? You freak out a lot!! You size up every child you see. And try to estimate how much a child grows in the time that you last got the height and weight of yours. You want your child to be well fed and healthy....but this selfish side in you doesn't want them to grow any more before they are in your arms (ok and grown out of the adorable clothes in their closet they have never worn). In the past 12 months we have bought and remodeled our forever house. Just to come to the conclusion that forever sounds like an awfully long time without grandmas, grandpas and cousins for our little one. So what was good and OH SO WARM (best thing about AZ) for 2, Isn't the best for 3. So we're in the middle of closing on our house. Between a complete renovation, adoption, and moving...been more than busy.  Yet that cute little daughter of ours never leaves our mind. No matter how busy you get she is still too far away. Her adorable little empty room and closet that is soon to be packed up is my happy place. I love seeing her clothes hanging in there. And the dolls sitting on the shelf waiting to be destroyed. You worry about her being loved every day and pray your heart out more than you ever have in your life that she is safe, that someone makes her smile, and that she isn't hungry, and that she is healthy. Then you wake up the next morning missing her more than the day before and you just keep surviving and waiting, and SMILING because she is yours!!!

REFERRAL

June 22nd 2012

I was painting walls today in the house and my phone rings.  I didn’t answer it bc I didn’t recognize the number.  Well they left a voicemail.  So I called and listened to it.  And it was Cyndi saying “We think we have a referral for you!  Call me back”!  Not even 24 hours since we passed court and we had a referral!!!”  My heart was about to beat out of my chest.  I couldn’t believe what I was hearing.  So she said she would send pictures over.  She told me that our little girl was in an orphanage that they have never adopted from before in Katana.  She said she has a very prominent umbilical hernia and that Julia has seen her in person and says you look healthy and you’re a doll.  She also said her blood tests all came back negative for HIV and Hep B and c.  However the sickle cell test wasn’t there or wasn’t done.  So we won’t know about the sickle cell until you are in Kinshasa and can get it done. But if we aren’t concerned about those things then we can start the process.  I got Colin on the phone and out of my mind excited told him we were about to get our first pictures of her!! WE HAD A REFERRAL!  He was totally shocked and couldn’t believe it.  I told him I’d call when I got the email of pictures.  I think I hung up and was painting like a maniac!  I called my mom and told her I was about to get my first picture of her!  That was such a long wait for that email.  I glanced over at the laptop a trillion times checking to see if it had come yet.  Then Colin called and asked if I got it yet.  While on the phone with him it came!  He wasn’t at a computer so he let me open the email while I was with him.  The pictures took SOOOOOOO LONG to download. I was going CRAZY!  Then there she was!!!  Frowny faced and ADORABLE as can be. She looked so different in each picture and it is such a surreal moment to see your baby girl for the first time.  There was a picture at the bottom where she is stunningly beautiful with huge gorgeous eyes and a perfect little nose and ears.  And I was just IN LOVE.  I knew that she was just meant to be our little girl.  Colin was very emotional of course and we just had happy tears and couldn’t believe it.  Then the day went like a whirlwind.  I had to call EVERYONE and tell them all that WE HAVE A PICTURE!!!  Everyone just fell in love with her instantly.  I text messaged the rest of the family and friends that have been involved in the adoption and announced that we have a picture!  It was so unexpected and so perfect.  And she is so perfect and stunning. Her name at the orphanage is Regine Marie. Her nickname has been Zola since the home study. So now we just call her a little bit of everything. But it doesn't matter because WE ARE IN LOVE!!

HOME STUDY PROCESS

Feb. 23rd 2012 - June 21st 2012

All I can say is I have never checked the mail so much in my life. Getting a home study approved in Arizona is the longest process EVER.  16 weeks through the lovely court system waiting for a judge to sign your documents. My suggestion is choose another place to live. People say you definitely learn to be patient in times like these.  I don't think I learned to be patient... I just didn't have a choice! Pretty soon I found myself boycotting the mail box. Not even wanting to put myself through the disappointment of opening it up to find nothing but junk and bills. Very mature I know....LOL. It really became pathetic. The day I finally decided to get the mail because I didn't want the mailman to be mad at me for no longer getting it.  I for the 1st time wasn't expecting ANYTHING. Isn't that how life works? There it was. My approved home study. I think I cried all the way up the street. I couldn't wait to be a part of the people that were waiting for a referral. I emailed our case worker Cyndi and told her the news. She had no idea how long it would take for us to get a referral but said she would start trying to match us with one.  We had put in for a little girl age 0-3 years old. I had the feeling that I was going to become an expert at checking my email!!!

Why the DR Congo?

It's a popular and valid question. Why did you choose the DR Congo? At the risk of sounding cliche in so many ways it chose us. I am going to give a quick history. I fell in love with my best friend Colin watching him with children in China. Needless to say I sunk my claws into him, married him, and went back to China for more. Fell in love with the country and was certain that when we were ready we would adopt a little girl from China. Little did we know how different life would be 9 years later. We moved across the country, finished college, traveled, moved some more. After Utah, China, Connecticut, Arizona, we finally started feeling like it was about the right time to look into starting an adoption. One night I started doing some research on the internet and fell upon a website talking about DR Congo. I read briefly about the devastating situation there and the estimated 5 million street orphans in the country. After that I couldn't seem to get it out of my head. Nobody was lining up for 6 years to help and love these children. I tried hard to ignore the pull I had towards this new idea. Kept looking in to China adoptions. Learned that times have DEFINITELY changed in the China adoption programs since we lived there 8 years prior. There was now a 5-6 year waiting list for a healthy girl. And I still had some time to kill before turning 30. Which is a necessary requirement in China. That is just 1 of the pages of crazy requirements to adopt abandoned children in China. It really started to upset us in so many ways.  Our 9 year plan was being thrown up in the air. Why would a country make it so hard to help the hundreds of thousands of children in need of a home? China was our country!!! It was what we had envisioned for so long!! But we were not waiting 6 years to start the family that we had already waited 9 to start. It was a little heart breaking. We thought we had such a connection to the country it just made sense. Well I still had that little voice in the back of my head reminding me about DR Congo. Flashes of photographs that I couldn't get out of my head. And that instant love and connection I felt that first night that I learned about DR Congo. It was time to bring it up again to Colin. He had always kept an open mind about the DR Congo.  Together we decided to lay the China idea to rest. The DRC had been in front of us for the past year screaming to be heard. We finally got the sense to listen. We were both on board.  And 100% certain that we made the right choice. Our little girl was coming from Congo.

The Timeline

                                                                TIMELINE

• Feb. 23rd 2012:  First visit from Molly our social worker. Began home study. Got the news that once documents are submitted it can take up to 24 weeks in Arizona to get home study approval. Very very discouraging. But finally taking step 1 and we were thrilled. How do you eat a whole elephant?  One bite at a time.  Here we go!!!
• Feb. 24th:  Colin took the day off to go get our 1st set of fingerprints. Lots of laughs at our ink stained fingers. Headed to the post office to send out papers to all our generous referrals. Thank you guys so much!
• Feb. 28th. Aunt Ang text to say her referral packet is done! She says:  "It only took 5 minutes but she would have done it even if it took 5 hours!! I am soo excited!!!!!" She nicknamed you baby Zola. 
• March 1st:  All our other referrals have their stuff submitted and have been such HUGE supports!! Thank you guys so much!!
• March 7th.  FINAL DAY OF HOME STUDY. And Grandma Judy's birthday.
• March 12th:  Fingerprints submitted for home study.
• April 4th: Bought her first toy. (Ariel doll from the Disney Store.  Couldn't resist her hair!)
• May 13th: Fingerprint Clearance
• June 21st: COURT APPROVED HOME STUDY.
• June 22nd: WE GOT OUR REFERRAL!! FIRST PICTURES OF OUR LITTLE GIRL! 
• July 19th: USCIS Fingerprint appointment issued for Aug. 6th.
• July 20th:  Forget waiting until Aug. 6th we want her home now!  Met Colin for lunch and we headed to USCIS to get our biometrics done BEFORE our appointment day.  GREAT thinking!!! They didn't even hesitate and got us taken care of.
• Aug. 8th: USCIS Clearance in the mail.  Yes 2 days after the scheduled date because we didn't wait! Our 9th wedding anniversary.  Best gift EVER!
• Aug 18-19th:  Cyndi got the documents needed to send to Paul the lawyer in Congo
• Sept. 8th 2012:  HAPPY 2ND BIRTHDAY to our darling angel.
• Oct. 11th 2012:  First time speaking with Julia. She found our little girl at the orphanage. Was so great to speak with someone who has actually met our daughter.
• Oct. 20th: WE HAVE A COURT DATE!!
• Oct. 22nd:  Court in DRC. Now 30 day hold.
• Oct. 23rd First new pictures of her since June. Best surprise ever.
• Oct. 27th: Run for Congo Women in SLC
• Nov. 18th :UN attack helicopters target M23 rebels in Eastern Congo.
• Nov. 19th : 30 day hold period post court is up.
• Nov. 22nd: Thanksgiving. Hard day without her. Got news they are trying to evacuate her from Eastern Congo.
• Nov. 26th: Bought the first pair of little girl shoes.  This is going to be dangerous.